(EXPANDED FROM 6/22/2023)
Frank Aberdene was new to marketing luxury cars, yet his first assignment was a particularly tough one: the 1978 Lincoln Versailles. After discarding drafts for days on end, he finally — and ever so discreetly — asked colleagues what they would do. Alas, they weren’t much help. He found out later that they had successfully maneuvered to avoid getting this assignment.
The problem was that Lincoln’s new compact looked like a Ford Granada with an overabundance of J. C. Whitney adds ons, yet it was given the brand’s highest price tag. To make matters worse, the catsup oracles decided to name the car after a grand French palace — a name more appropriate for a big car.
Not surprisingly, the Versailles was ridiculed after it was introduced in 1977. Also not surprisingly, it did not sell very well. Only slightly more than 15,000 cars left the factory that year. In contrast, the Cadillac Seville saw output rise to over 45,000 units despite being in its third year of production with minimal changes.
In desperation, Frank decided that he should try to turn the car’s humble origins into an advantage. So he mocked up the following print advertisement:
Frank tries to appeal to people’s sense of cynical irony
As you can see from the above ad, Frank quickly dispensed with the idea that the Versailles should continue to try competing directly against the Seville. Despite the Lincoln’s high price tag, Frank decided to pitch the car for people who wanted a more casual approach to luxury . . . and a decent tax write off.
Most importantly, Frank assumed that honesty was the best policy. This was naught but a gussied up Ford Granada, so why not acknowledge — or even revel — in it? That’s why he came up with a corporate tie in with Hostess packaged snacks.
Although the approach was edgy, Frank thought it could give the Versailles a badly needed splash of attention by appealing to the cynical irony that had become so pervasive during the corrosive 1970s.
Lincoln management quickly rejected the idea — and instead demanded that the ad emphasize the car’s supposedly superior engineering. Frank ruefully laughed himself silly when he wrote the version of the ad that was published:
A bland ad that sold blandly . . . who knew?
As it turned out, the Versailles saw its production fall substantially to under 9,000 units in 1978. Meanwhile, the Seville jumped in output again — this time to more than 53,000 units. Simply put, Lincoln was being completely outclassed.
In a truly extraordinary act of self awareness, Lincoln management didn’t blame poor sales on the advertising. Instead, a rush-job redesign was made for 1979 that gave the Versailles’ roofline a Seville-like, almost vertical C-pillar. Sales more than doubled even though the ads were even blander.
Frank was relieved — he was starting to get the hang of the luxury-car market.
NOTES:
This post is a parody that was first published on June 22, 2023 and expanded on Feb. 6, 2026. For further discussion about what is real, go here. Production figures are from the auto editors of Consumer Guide (2002).
RE:SOURCES
- Auto editors of Consumer Guide; 2006. Encyclopedia of American Cars. Publications International, Lincolnwood, Ill.
ADVERTISING & BROCHURES:
- oldcaradvertising.com: Lincoln Versailles (1978)
This is a perfect parody but the “real world” of it is just how accurate it is at being a lame ass Ford attempt to counter the Cadillac Seville. Although the Cadillac started with a Nova platform it was changed extensively in technical details and got unique sheetmetal and interior.
Ford on the other hand, decided they could gussie up a Monarch/Granada with nose and tail caps and expect the public would not recognize it for what it was.
Had Ford gived more unique sheetmetal to the Versailles like they tried to do with the Fox-body 1982 Continental, if things could have been different?
For a good period of time Ford believed that brand differentiation was fully achieved with just different front and rear caps and body side moldings. They did not do much, if any, actual change in the sheetmetal. Beyond this Versailles, also look at the Grenada and Monarch to see how this was executed. On a few occasions they would do a double strike along with the caps for a different look – see the Fox body Mustang and Capri for this.
This did change later after Iacocca was gone and Bordinat retired.
I saw this exterpt from the August 2002 issue of Collectible Automobile showing clay models of a proposed 1981 Lincoln Versailles.
http://www.lincolnversailles.com/ca2002.htm
If Lincoln had taken that path, the Continental nameplate would probably stayed on the full-size Lincoln for a couple of additional years. Then who knows if a 3rd-gen Versailles would have gone FWD using the Taurus platform?
Those are interesting clay models. Thank you for sharing them.
IIRC from articles at the time that the Versailles was built with higher grade materials and more meticulous construction. It also had the first clear coat paint, about the only special upgrade besides the French whorehouse interior that could be seen. Still, before the later modified roofline, it looked just like the Monarch it shared a showroom with. I also understand that it shared visible interior components with the top of the line Monarch. Also, they used Frank Sinatra heavily in their ads, marking this as an old man’s car. HYou can sell a”young” car to an old person, but not the reverse.
The Lincoln Versailles should have been the 1978 Mercury Monarch, period. I have got to believe that the Versaille was a Lido Iacocca dream car for using what had begun as a Maverick platform. No wonder Iacocca fell out of favor with Hank the Deucehhhh.
DATELINE DEARBORN, 1960:
“Boys, the imports are killing us. We thought they’d go away, but they just keep coming. We gotta have something to compete against ‘em. Small, but American. Cheap to buy, cheaper to build. Come up with something quick to stem the tide.” The Boss looked worried.
“We got it Boss. It’s plain. It’s simple. It will put the Beetle in its place and we’ll own the market. We’re calling it the Falcon,” the Minions said.
DATELINE DEARBORN, 1970:
“Men, the imports are still killing us. We thought we had the answer, but apparently we didn’t. At least the market didn’t think so. We gotta have something to offer that will get back some market share in the small car field. Something that’ll drive people to the showrooms again.” The Boss still looked worried.
“We got it, Boss. We’ll take the Falcon, spruce it up, call it ‘Maverick’ and make it a competitor against the imports. People will love it. We’ll start out with a 2-door coupe and see how it goes. Add a sedan later. We’ll own the market again.”
“Didn’t we already turn the Falcon into a Mustang?” The Boss was on his toes.
“Exactly. Biggest seller since the Model T. We proved the formula works!” The Minions were on top of their game.
Trusting the Minions, The Boss left for his manicure and massage feeling as though the answer was well at hand.
DATELINE DEARBORN, 1975:
“The imports from Germany and Sweden are killing us. The sales of our sedan-yachts are tanking because of the darned oil situation. We gotta come up with something, the stock is tanking because of our tanks.” The Boss looked worried and was slurring his words.
“Already on it, Boss. We take the Maverick, make it boxy and slap on a vinyl top and some fake wood grain. Make people think it looks like a Mercedes. Run ads with the two of them together. Call it a ‘Granada’. Sounds kind of European.” The Minions had done their homework. “We’ll make a Mercury version called ‘Monarch’. Nothing more European than Monarchs. Even throw a four-on-the-floor in a few of them and call it sporty!”
“But isn’t that really just the Falcon from a decade and a half ago?” The Boss wasn’t slurring his words as much as they thought he was.
“They’ll never know,” the Minions replied. “Trust us.”
The Boss was late for his court date to get rid of Wife #2. He trusted they had the situation fully under control.
DATELINE DEARBORN, 1977:
“Cadillac is kicking our backside with this new small Cadillac. Never thought I’d see the day!” The Boss looked tired, concerned, and like his mind might be somewhere else. Maybe Wife #3. “We gotta do something.”
“Way ahead of you, Boss.” The Minions were ready this time. “We take the Granada, slap a Lincoln grille on the front and a fake tire hump on the trunk. We come up with a new paint process to make it shiny. We thought we’d call it ‘Clearcoat’. Folks will be so impressed with the paint, they won’t notice that it’s a Granada underneath. Seats will be leather. More fake wood grain all around the cabin. We’ll call it ‘Versailles’. It sounds French!”
“It is French, you idiot,” The Boss still had it. “And isn’t all this really just the Falcon from nearly 20 years ago? I just don’t know how much we can get by with. Things are different now. People are smarter.”
The Minions thought the Boss might be on to them.
“But still . . . it might just work.”
Gotta do it in a Montgomery Burns and Waylon Smithers voice.
https://tinyurl.com/yvpd9b28
The Argentinian Falcon was far less baroque and more important, much smaller and lighter with the same wheelbase as the L. Versailles
I insist on the weight factor because of this article
https://www.curbsideclassic.com/automotive-histories/automotive-history-vintage-review-1975-ford-granada-250-six-wins-the-most-malaise-car-ever-award-a-triumph-of-imitative-style-over-substance/
Of course, the European Ford Granada was the obvious Lincoln Versailles, but US doesn’t want anything to remind of their European heritage, except a car is sold by a European brand
Everyone knew at the outset that the ”Versailles’ would not please Louis XIV. It would be off with his head – that Louis did not have to power to do. The Town Car – maybe.
Perhaps Iacocca was enjoring a Canadian sunset again when he sketched out in his head the Seville competitor. Take a Granada /Monarck really doll up the interior and add chassis strenghening and real suspension upgrades – and a new star would be born – just like GM did with its Seville.
That anyone thought this preposterous effort would succeed – is mind blowing.
However – Iacocca being who he is – he will later blow smoke in your face.
The 1979 Versaille was a big improvement of the 1977 – 78 version. A new roofline and a few other dewdads changed the car significantly. What the sales were – I dont know – but Mac Namaras’ warning – dont reinvent the wheel – eerily reappeared.
What is Lincoln today ? A series of smoothed over Fords.