Automotive blinders, also known as auto peepers, are the narrowing of windows between the C- and D-pillars of vehicles. This design feature blocks a driver’s rearward vision, which assists in human population control by inducing collisions or heart attacks due to near misses.
Among the first known blinders were those installed on the tiny 2013 BMW i3. However, most blinders have been used in beefy sport-utility vehicles such as the 2018-21 GMC Terrain (shown above) and the 2016-21 Lexus RX350. Studies have shown that the more obese the vehicle, the more successful this design feature has been in population control.
Blinders are made out of sheetmetal or carbon fiber and are typically painted the color of the vehicle’s body. Some versions have tasteful strips of chrome or black plastic to disguise their lethal impacts.
Benefits
American studies have shown that blinders help reduce the number of people on the road by making it more difficult to execute roadway lane changes and parking lot maneuvers without serious injury or death. Population reduction has also lowered housing costs and improved food utilization (partly due to less spillage).
Although some collisions only result in back and neck injuries, they generally increase healthcare costs, thereby improving the profitability of privately owned healthcare providers.
In addition, those drivers who are not involved in collisions may experience neck ailments due to the increased time needed to look rearward. This can result in adjustment problems in human feeding, and protracted displacement neck preening among young male drivers. Studies have shown that an increase in the incidence of these maladies has been a leading factor in the growth of the physical therapy industry.
Welfare concerns
Blinders almost certainly cause pain to the humans involved in collisions. This is why Norway, Sweden and Finland have banned their use in all passenger vehicles sold in these countries despite heavy protests of global automakers. A complaint is pending before the World Trade Organization.
Studies indicate that fitting a vehicle with wider blinders can increase rearward visibility. Although this may improve the vehicle’s styling, it also reduces the incidence of collisions — and thus the benefits of population control.
NOTES:
Our satirical definition of “Auto blinders” was modeled on the Wikipedia (2021) entry for “Blinders (poultry).” For more information about what is real, go here.
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- Wikipedia; 2021. “Blinders (poultry).” Page last modified Feb. 2.
There are none so blind as those who cannot see to make a lane change.
The advent of rear facing cameras and lane changing warning lights allows for styling with reduced window visibility. Odd these modern safety features are not mentioned in this article.
Welp, maybe I’m old fashioned, but I don’t think fancy tech is a complete substitute for rearward visibility.
Apparently all the safety features in the world still can’t get drivers to use their turn signals.